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Sessions & Rip.TV Contest - Winning Video

J Dogg — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 22:52:51 -0500

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So random. Sessions and Rip.TV put on a video contest, with entrants vying for a trip to ski with Shane McConkey in Squaw Valley, including 2-nights lodging at The Village at Squaw, round-trip airfare (anywhere in North America), 1 day of skiing with Shane McConkey, 2-day lift tickets to Squaw Valley and Steve will also receive a Sessions Signature Shane
McConkey Gore Jacket.

The winning video by Steve Crowe is suuuuper random, thought somebody might get a kick out of it.

Ski Bikes - Oh My

J Dogg — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 21:20:06 -0500

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Man on man, we don't know if this counts as a gear review or not, but uh, it must be pretty serious gear because somebody seems to think SkiBiking is worth it's own magazine.

Yep, was just browsing away, innocently looking at ski websites, when someone I found myself at http://www.skibikemagazine.com/, the official SkiBike Magazine website. My favourite pages of course being the 'Clubs', the Gallery which is sadly empty because no Snowbiker are man enough to submit their photos, and, well, now that we look at it almost the whole site is empty.

Tantalizing to say the least. I might have to cancel our upcoming ski review and just hit the SnowBike Park instead.

Gaper Day 2007 Video Released

J Dogg — Tue, 2 Oct 2007 22:47:46 -0400

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At last, Gaper Day 2007, a mockumentary by Paul Cotton, has been released for the public world to enjoy. After a packed audience ate it up at My Millennium Place on the weekend, it's now live on the web for all to enjoy.

Rock grinds galore, bush skiing, rapid fire straight-lines, terrain park gang bangs, bizarre outfits, some deep thoughts, and some day-wrecking bails. All captured on digi and edited by the one and only Paul Cotton.

Gaper Day 2007 - The Ultimate Regression

J Dogg — Wed, 6 Jun 2007 23:20:57 -0400

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Words cannot describe the display of sillyness, ferocity, passion, fashion innovation, and blasphemy that made up Gaper Day 2007 - a day for all gapers to be proud of. It was in the cards, the most epic winter season in memory could only be followed by an even more epic season ender bender. The slushy snow conditions were prime, the temps - a smoking 30 degrees celsius, and the stars were aligned. We think.

A 40-pack of Gapers slowly emerged from different corners of the village, gathering at ground zero at the Longhorn, much to the confusion of tourists and Mountain Bike Park riders alike. Out came one-pieces, jean shorts, spandex, hot-pants & fish-nets, bikinis, suit jackets, and to top it all off - Jonny "Nacho Libre" Law in full topless sparkling mexican wrestling attire. Some morning stair grinding by the Pan Pacific set the tone for the day, but it was only the beginning of what was to come.

With only a few chairlifts open, the horde of gapers (now some 6 dozen strong) were confined to the narrow reaches of Jersey Cream Chair, making for a Gaper concentration like never before. Rapid fire chain-gang off the table-tops, gang-bang attacks on Lift Line, the Bite, and Cafe Cliffs, and general good-quality gaper shredding.

With such an epic pack of shredders, no one Gaper was able to stand out amongst the do-do birds and 'officially' claim the Sillygoating World Champion title... but some honorable mentions are well deserved:

...Jonny Law for taking ski fashion to a whole new level, and breaking his ski while he was at it

...S.M.U.T. for given'er like only he can, and drawing blood for safe measure

...that high-school kid pointing it like no-one else

...Bob Kitchen for kartwheeling into the days' first bail segment

...Lotte for reminding us that all Snowlerbladers are fairies, literally

...Giggs for not taking no for an answer when it came to the great 'ski to the valley' debate, and the brave souls who followed him

...yours truly, not to toot my own horn, but think I claimed the bail of the day by a healthy margin, with the ditch to spread eagle on land to header somersault on dirt & rocks

...and lastly, the guy in the speedo, whoever he was. Did he even know it was Gaper Day?

Here's a few shots from official Gaper photographer Jordan Manley that can only hint at the nonsense of the day. Plus keep your eye out for Paul Cotton's video coming at'cha soon. Afterall, if words can't describe it, we can only hope Paul's-eye-view captured some of the glorious and monumental regressions in freeskiing that was Gaper Day 2007.

Jonny "Nacho Libre" Law in fine form.

Merlins stairs adding new terrain to Blackcomb.

Uh, yup.

Lift line assault. Bit overexposed, but hey, so were we.

Some people are taking their park skills to the backcountry, Brian is taking it indoors.

Andre sillygoating.

This one speaks for itself.

Mathieu and the girls, uh, all pretty in pink.

Chad & Andre capping off an epic day in style.

Gaper Day 2007 - Coming June 3

J Dogg — Wed, 23 May 2007 00:05:33 -0400

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The time has come. The moment we've all been waiting for. The reason this epic season of 0607 was even started in the first place. Yes for one glorious Day. Gaper Day 2007 - June 3rd on Blackcomb. Be there. 11am at Longhorn patio.

Who: Everyone who has a bad-ass outfit to show off, and likes sliding on snow

What: Retro/Gorbie/Gaper/You Name It. Dress better than your best Gorbie sighting ever, and come armed with rock skis to help progress sillygoat skiing and riding to the next level. Where that will take us, nobody knows.

When/Where: Sunday June 3rd. Last day of Blackcomb. Meet 11am at Longhorn patio.

Why: Some things in life can't be tamed, and shouldn't be held back for more than a year at a time. Oh yes, it's time to release your undying urge to bust out the skinny skis or monoboard and your favourite tight ski pants - and show the world what you were put on this earth to do.

We'll see you there. Tell all your friends. Hell, tell everyone. 11am, Sunday June 3rd, Longhorn Patio, then heading up Blackcomb. AFTER PARTY details to be released day of, or with a secret handshake. After all, we wouldn't want the riffraff to come out now would we?

While we're at it... some teases from Gaper Days' past. Enjoy...

Gaper Day 2003 (hot dogging, and gang bang skiing at it's finest)

Gaper Day 2004 (taking grass skiing to a new level)

Gaper Day 2005 (Rain, Survival suits, & Sasquatchs)

Gaper Day 2006 (Can it be topped? Yes that's a Challenge)

And a quick clip from '05...

Pre Season Scoping

J Dogg — Sun, 8 Oct 2006 22:01:03 -0400

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They say you should always scope your landings. So why not scope out the whole mountain! Doglotion was eager to find out exactly what dangers lay beneath some of Whistler's more notorious runs, so we set out onto Whistler Mountain this weekend for some pre season reconnaisance. And hey we'd heard about some freshies in the alpine, who knew, maybe some lines were already good to go...

Trudging through 1cm of new snow, we were able to make our way around the mountain, scoping things out for the season. The verdict overall? Uh, we need more snow. But that'll come. Here's some of our findings...

Air Jordan... yep, needs a bit more snow I think.

Don't Miss... hmmm, yep this sucker needs some more snow too.

Weekend chutes... bit whiter, but yep, still think we need more snow. No wonder you're not allowed to ski here.

Hmmm, not sure what this sign was telling us, must be an off-season thing.

Blackcomb Closing Day Closeout

J Dogg — Sat, 29 Jul 2006 13:35:59 -0400

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The following story is true, but the names were changed to protect the innocent.

Yep, it had to happen sooner or later. After easily one of the best season's in memory, Blackcomb Mountain closed it's doors for the season yesterday, April 23, 2006. Hard to see it end, with so much snow still up there to be shredded. But we weren't going to let it off easy. So the 'Silly Web Magazine from Whistler that rhymes with hogpotion' and a not-so-random pack of 60 some odd Whistler locals set out to close the season in style - on Blackcomb Peak of all places.

As early lift closures threatened our plans, everyone diverted in different directions, frantically trying to find a way up to the peak. The whiter one-piece with the BBQ was sighted going one way, while the weiners and Wildcats awaited the Horstman T-Bar, and the buns were nowhere in sight.

But nobody in this posse was going to let lift closures or gravity stand in the way of plans. And sure enough, as the clocked turned 4, a steady procession of shady characters starting marching across the Blackcomb glacier and up towards Blackcomb peak. It's not often you look up the glacier and see 3 dozen people in a row, let alone the bizarre assortment of one-piece outfits, backpacks full of beer, a guy with his pants down, some white trash and even a fluffy yellow tiger.

As soon as the chain-gang started summiting the peak, music was playing, the BBQ was flaming, and beer was flowing - while the 2 dozen more stragglers contiued to stumble in for another 2 hours. Not satisfied with just a BBQ, out came the golf club for some high altitude driving practice - and yes - Tiger Woods himself was among the particpants.

And just as the sun started setting and people starting descending their various lines, the eager crew of late-stayers embarked on a mission to build the first-known booter on Blackcomb Peak. Sure it had a landing flatter than Mantioba, but that didn't stop everyone from busting daffies, frogs, and 360 spreaders until the landing ditch got too deep to bear. So without further ado, reluctantly, everyone strapped on their skis and shredded the half-refrozen schmoo snow in every which direction from the peak to Merlins.

At 9 something oclock, we'd strectched out our last day on Blackcomb as long as we could. Sure it'll be back next year, but that was the last thought on everyone's mind. While we sat daydreaming about the season passed, I suspect everyone was simultaneously hit with one of those surfer-dude movie voice-over guys tapping into our mind telling us... "Hey, it's over man. It's over. Just let it go man, just let it go. Can I borrow a dollar?"

MORE PHOTOS ON FLICKR

Gaper Day 2006

J Dogg — Sat, 8 Jul 2006 00:00:00 -0400

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Words by J Dogg. Photos by Jordan Manley. Video by Paul Cotton.

You're sitting innocently at the top of the terrain park, fixing your goggles and prepping for your all-too-serious new trick. You hear 'Rapid Fire Chain Gang' yelled behind you as a pack of 30 freaks in jeans, pink stretchies and garbage bags come barreling into the jumps, all within feet of each other, and a majestic display of spraffies, twisters, flips, spins, froggies and flicketies unfolds.

You're enjoying a casual stroll through the village when some dude with a mohawk comes skiing past you down the pan pacific stairs.

You're out with the family cruising Red Chair laps, when the whole family is blinded and bewildered as a monoboarder whisks past you... buck naked.

If you are one of the victims of Gaper Day 2006 we apologize, but ask you the question, why weren't you too wearing a yellow one-piece and skiing alongside us?

This June 4, Gaper Day 2006 went off like none other. Despite the semi-extreme rainy conditions, Gapers showed up from far and wide to digress the level of sillygoating once again. The Whistler boys were out in full swing, and Gapers from Seattle crossed the border to join the celebration. If Jeremy Nobis were there, you might have heard him say something like "You know, I really think I not only progressed my own skiing on this trip, but I progressed the sport of freeskiing as well." Well, um, he wasn't there, so we took the sport of freeskiing into our own hands, and the digression of sillygoating ensued.

Just before the stroke of noon, the motley crew of dressed up skiers and snowlerbladers gathered at the Longhorn, consumed what they wanted, and headed up the gondi. Spilling out of the gondola, the rampant chain gang chased it's own tail around the mountain for hours of to come. The terrain park was pillaged, the Peak was assaulted, and the muddy mid-station lap fought back. The level of sillyness was so high that the group was unable to single out one all-mighty Sillygoating Champion, but we all have our picks and your new bedroom wall poster-boys and girls.

Highlights and lowlights included James Heim straightling with a vengeance on his skinnies, Ian McIntosh and Brandon Anderson getting intimate with rocks, Smut & Robby Dag's spinning wizardry, Brett Crabtree's rock navigating, Leif Zapf-Gilje's usual grass skiing domination, and of course Captain Canada (name withheld incase witnesses didn't know it was 'cold out') skiing naked down the Red Chair.

Meanwhile, industry scouts and peanut gallery gossipers are spreading rumours that Duncan Doughnuts was skiing hard all day long in fine sillygoating form, and may well have taken the unofficial Dodo Bird title with waterfall skiing, rockstepping, flat-land ski ballet, and sexy pants. He's a threat to watch out for next year, when the Dodo Bird Trophy will be introduced and awarded to the 2007 Silly Goating World Champion.

Oh wait, almost forgot about the party. Ok, most of us already have forgotten the party, but the pieces are coming back. All Gapers still standing at the end of the day headed to Whistler Cay to close down the season in style, with a keg of beer and Vodka Base a' plenty, while local rockers put on a show in front of the bonfire.

That's all we can tell you, and with that, Winter 05/06 at Whistler comes to an end. We'll see you next June, and until then, here's Paul Cotton's video to inspire...

WATCH THE VIDEO
(WMV Format, 15MB)
By Paul Cotton

View More Gaper Photos by Jordan Manley, or more films by Paul Cotton.

Special thanks to Jordan and Paul for their photo and video goodies, the party hosts Smut, Dana, Turtle, Ian & Heimer for knowing how to party, Eric Blouin from Base Energy drink for the 'Freebase', Fez for the keg, us for the Vodka, and all the sillygoaters of Gaper Day 2006.

Gaper Day Challenge

J Dogg — Fri, 5 May 2006 00:00:00 -0400

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Some see competition and get discouraged.

They immediately wuss out, go home with their tail between their legs and do tequila shots by themselves in the basement unti they pass out. Not

hing wrong with that, but that's not us, and hopefully not you either.

Some see it as a challenge. And this my friends, is a challenge from Doglotion to you. Batten down the hatches, hide the senior citizens and children, avoid wearing anything flammable (unless that's part of the plan), and get ready for the season ender like none-other. Gaper Day 2006 is coming the la

st day of Whistler Mountain's season: Sunday, June 4, 2006. All winter long we've been buried in powder, unable to let our true colours shine on the mountain. That all changes June 4, and to ensure you spare no expense when preparing for the annual day of revelry, we thought we'd share this wee challenge with you.

Gaper Day -

East Coast Style
The tiny hill of Ski Wentworth closed the season with a Retro Ride to the Top, and the Coca Cola Family Challenge Dual Slalom, complete with manual timi

ng gates and the works. The following mugshots were submitted directly to Doglotion HQ, accompanied with the words: "Let's see what you got".

Are you going to take that? We will not be outdone people. We will rise to the challenge, with or without tequila, and Gaper Day 2006 will go off - rain or shine. Be there, and stay tuned for further inspiration.

Ski Epic 2006

J Dogg — Wed, 1 Feb 2006 00:00:00 -0500

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By Jeremy Law

No one really saw it coming. No one thought it could be pulled off. No one had a clue what was going on the whole entire time.

The appropriately named Ski Epic 2006 took off from Halifax on January 5th with a total of 165 confused and anxious skiers and riders for one crazy road trip. As the bus convoy crossed the bridge to Dartmouth most were all still wondering if they had had the wool pulled over their eyes and were actually heading out on an elaborate bus tour designed to give the organizers enough time to get out of town with their money. Unfortunately for Parc Regional Val d'Irene near Amqui, Quebec this group was really on it's way to their little, isolated, and quaint corner of the world; and about to leave their mark in a big way.

Not to say that Val d'Irene hasn't had their fair share of university trips or spring time Aqua-Neige festivals for decades, but this was all new to them. With the entire accommodation complex booked solid, a crew staying in town with shuttle service, and a group in rented chalets, they were up to their eyes in immaturity, English, and broken glass for the weekend with nothing to say but Tabernac.

Now, speaking for most participants, it gets a little hazy after bonjour. All should consider themselves lucky that it wasn't the usual -30 and windy in the Matape for this weekend. Perfect weather meant great skiing and riding throughout the trip, especially with thoughts drifting back to the green and wet city by the water that was Halifax in the beginning and ongoing '06 Winter.

Friday night meant Dr. Law's School of Retrology was in session. Those with the prerequisite from the smaller Ski Epic 2005 -- Ski Wear 101 -- were invited to step it up a notch and school the newbies in everything retro. Costumes were hilarious, music was low and from some portable speakers, and the light was the kind you might see in a basement games room. Like anyone even noticed.

This was the only on-hill picture found that didn't have a beer bottle in it. Photo: Chris Webster Skier: Jeremy Law

Saturday saw a slower start on the mountain, but no shortage of less-than-healthy students on the sagging diesel 2 person chair that gives Parc Regional Val-d'Irene most (but not all) of it's je ne sais quoi. Most discovered the gnarly, natural, and liftless backside and thoroughly enjoyed the BackSide Bus experience complete with smoking and hyper-friendly French guy. Some others slept the previous night off, hit the mountain for a while, and then napped in preparation for another night of insanity. Some ski trip heh?

Behold Parc Regional Val D'Irene in all it's frenchness. Old stomping grounds of Hugo Harrison. Seriously.

Sprained ankle & bloody nose. You might think it was skiing related...
Think again.

The surprise party theme Saturday night was embraced by all except the 'townies' that arrived in togas for the Ski Epic 2006 Long Underwear Party in the hill's bar. D.J.Z laid down hot tracks from random, unmarked cds that were handed to him and iPods that were passed his way with little to no regard for their future condition. Although the bar management was less than impressed with the amount of alcohol that initially made it past the security, they seemed happy enough with the amateur 5 person shot-ski and the fast money made off of it until it broke.

Trip 'coordinators' D.J.Z, Black Swan, and Dr. Law (Retrology) closing the bar in fashion with a team pose on the podium/dance floor.

Pete 'Destroyer of All Things Good' Campbell thought it would be funny to wear little girls long underwear to the long underwear rager. He was right.
Sure, other things were broken. Holes in walls formed and tables were destroyed beyond recognition. Fire --or smoke-- alarms rang throughout the night and interrupted more than a few epic encounters. Maybe it was the fireworks, maybe it wasn't. Those more serious about skiing and riding were kept up way past their bedtime and couldn't believe they would be considered to be in the same demographic as those chewing tobacco inside without spit bottles.

Will it happen again? You can bet on it. Will it be as big? Probably not. Will it be as good? It can only get better.

And, as far as we know, nobody was left behind.

Proof that it actually happened. We need it.

Jamie Pierre Jumps Record Cliff

J Dogg — Mon, 30 Jan 2006 00:00:00 -0500

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Posted January 30, 2006

Yep, he finally did it. Big Air Jamie Pierre finally quit fooling around with his little 150ft Lincoln Loops, and went for the big one. With perfect snow conditions, he and a barrage of filmers and photographers headed up to a mother of a cliff on Grand Targhee Resort, where he clocked 245 feet of 4 seconds of air time... and didn't land on rocks this time. This is more of a blog post, but it deserved homepage action. Here's some details that have been floating around the media from a press release that was sent out, and we've tracked down an epic newspaper photo we understand was originally scanned by a powdermag user (thanks) for all to enjoy....

The lowdown:
Jamie Pierre has set a world-record cliff jump at the Grand Targhee Resort in Wyoming, dropping 245 vertical feet off the back of Fred's Mountain, and said he made his record-breaking jump on Wednesday as a way to spread the Christian word. "It wasn't some yahoo stunt,'' Pierre said. "I chose to do it so it would open up doors so I could witness my faith in Christianity.''

Pierre had been scoping the cliff for seven years, and finally found the right conditions to hit it. TGR was on site filming it, and measured the distance from the cornice to the landing hole with a range-finder to confirm the world record.

The previous world record was set by Paul Ahern of New Zealand, who jumped 225 feet in 1995. If we recall correctly, Paul landed on less-than-perfect snow, with styrofoam in his backpack to dampen the fall, ending up with a couple broken ribs.

Five photographers and three cinema shooters recorded the event, said Josh Nielsen of Teton Gravity Research. "It was a really, really heavy and intense experience for all of us,'' Nielsen said. He said Pierre managed the event and that the others were "kind of along for the ride.'' Observers were solemn before the jump, Nielsen said, adding that Pierre said a prayer before taking off and clocked four full seconds of air time.

About 100 feet into the jump, Nielsen said Pierre couldn't keep his skis under him and went upside down. He landed headfirst and blew a hole 6 feet deep into the snow.

Nielsen said a photographer rushed in and dug Pierre out of the snow. "Jamie pretty much walked away with a cut lip,'' he said. Pierre said he was lucky to be alive. "I'm lucky I didn't get hurt,'' he said. Pierre said he landed in the perfect spot. "I hit the nail on the head,'' he said, no pun intended. "The fact that I came out unscathed and landed where I planned, faith played a role in it.''

Pierre said he took grief from his wife and parents for his jump. He was born in Minnesota and moved first to Crested Butte, Colo., and then to Salt Lake City to ski.

Susie Barnett-Bushong, spokeswoman for Grand Targhee, warned anyone against trying to duplicate Pierre's jump.

"This nothing that an average recreational skier or snowboarder should consider doing,'' she said Friday. Even for elite skiers, she said, ``we would never recommend anybody try this.''

In January 2005, skier Brent "Newt'' Newton died after jumping off a 50-foot cliff at Jackson Hole Mountain Resort. Paul Ruff, a former world-record holder with a cliff jump of 110 vertical feet, died in the 1993 on a 160-foot attempt.

JP Auclair Going Old Skool

J Dogg — Thu, 7 Jul 2005 00:00:00 -0400

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While it's been mostly rainy and crummy up on the glacier this summer in Whistler, we're sure the next wave of grommets are likely still up there throwing down new tricks daily. Meanwhile, here's a few pics Whistler photographer Arne Gutmann had saved in his own sleeve of tricks... JP Auclair going big on a monoboard. Chicks in Europe will love him forever onwards. For more of Arne's photos, check out www.boardstars.com.

Gaper Day 2005

J Dogg — Mon, 20 Jun 2005 00:00:00 -0400

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When shredding mega-gnar lines through rocky slots and stormy man-eating blizzards, make sure your one-piece suit is bright enough to light your path, bro.

Luckily everyone who came out for Gaper Day 2005 was ready for the extreme elements, and the annual day of rockgrinding and bush hopping went off without a hitch. We awoke to unexpected, menacing rain clouds on June 5, the last day of Whistler/Blackcomb's ski season. Naive mortals cowered in fear, while keen Gapers knew there'd be freshies up top followed by extra slick grass lines below.

So after eagerly digging through their treasure trunks for the most tech'ed out ski suits to fight the elements, a group of hooligans converged at the base of the Whistler Gondola to celebrate the last day of the season in style - Gaper style. The day to celebrate all that's stupid about skiing, and there's plenty of it. We've all seen them before.

Those skiers or boarders who are still convinced that jeans are good things to take skiing, or that doing backscratchers on a monoski will still get them laid. Well, that might be true, but work with us here. We're talking about the 2 inch gap between goggles and toques, tight flourescent one-piece suits, rear-entry boots, big straight skis, snowlerblades, leopard print bandanas, you name it.

With storm clouds brewing, this year's gaper outfits took on new themes. Flourescent SteepTech one-pieces were a must, while others showed up with the always functional cold-water survival jacket, furry sasquatch suit, garbage bag over unitard, you name it.

Slush was carved, daffy's and spreads were linked from bump to bump, rocks were grinded, and a few rocks even bit back (see video). To end the day, the few gapers still standing skied a few thousand feet of uninterrupted grass and gravel under the gondola.

The "I can't see 10 feet in front of me" conditions prevented anyone from steaking claim to the DoDo Bird Award this year, but you can bet everyone will be training hard next winter in hopes of taking rock skiing one step further in '06.

Click here to watch Paul Cotton's Gaper Day 2005 Video.

For more of Paul's videos visit www.paulcottonfilms.com

Don't Miss - Skied Naked

J Dogg — Tue, 10 May 2005 00:00:00 -0400

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We realized that it's only 1 month until the annual Gaper Day on Whistler, and we it has been quite some time since we have published any 100% nonsense on the site. We've been distracted with ski trips, competition results, and relevant ski industry news. But fear not, they haven't suckered us in yet. Afterall, Doglotion.com is all about the ruckus and tomfoolery behind freeskiing, so it's time to kick it up a notch. From here in we at Doglotion.com vow to never forget the roots of the mag, with regular posting on the Tomfoolery page about the dumbest things we've seen on skis.

To start things off, the much anticipated video that's been hiding in our archives for a while. A Whistler ripper submitted a video of Whistler's ultimate poach, in his, uh, Birthday Suit. His identity will remain unknown, but what is known are the many benefits of Birthday suits, including:

way more breathability than traditional Gore-tex or new soft shells
great for improving your tan
and they do a great job of killing the 'gangsta' look in skiing, afterall, you don't get to choose what your birthday suit looks like

And we've even censored it to not scare the women and children away.

CLICK HERE FOR
the VIDEO

Taking Out the Euro Trash

J Dogg — Tue, 10 May 2005 00:00:00 -0400

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June 5, 2005 is a day to mark on your calendar. Hell, it's worth buying a calendar for. The umpteenth annual GAPER DAY will be going off once again on the last day of Whistler's ski season. It's only 2 weeks away, so we thought everyone might need a little inspiration. While in Europe in March/April, we went on a Gaper Patrol mission throughout Austria and Switzerland, here's just a select handful of photos from the birthplace and eternal homeland of flourescent one-piece suits. The rest are viewable on Flickr.

Early Season in Whistler

J Dogg — Sat, 1 Jan 2005 00:00:00 -0500

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Some old cheesy movie said 'Always look on the bright side of life!". Or was it a song? Anyway, when times are rough at your local ski resort, you can't let it bring you down, ol' chap. There's always a bright side.

Here in Whistler, BC 04/05 is off to a, ummm, slooooow start to the ski season, and the rain in mid December didn't help. So with man-eating crevasses in the middle of open runs and boulders and creeks everywhere, we figured it was time to practice some new skills. We had enough rock skiing in June, and the crevasses looked better for partying, so we stuck to the creeks as our stomping ground.

Here's a quick sequence of Sam 'Pole Vault' Cassevant crossing the creek at the end of Blackcomb Glacier. Just one of the many technical moves we found exploring Blackomb's alpine. Who knows what it might come in handy for! At the time it was a mandatory move that claimed many a skiers' lives, but now, sadly, the area is open to the public and a bridge has been built to help skiers across. Things just ain't as X as they used to be eh? You can still practice the crossing if you want...

X-Ray Contest

J Dogg — Tue, 16 Nov 2004 00:00:00 -0500

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Posted Nov 2004

To kick the season off in a quirky way, we decided to hold the first ever X-Ray contest. It may seem like a weird way to get stoked for the season, but who knows, maybe it'll get you stoked because you're glad these X-ray's aren't yours. Or maybe it'll force you to stomp those early-season landings so that you won't end-up with an x-ray of your own.

Apparently not everyone has a light table and a digi camera at their disposal, but the few entries that we did receive are pretty sweet. So rather than an X-Ray contest it's more of an X-Ray art exhibition. Enjoy...

'I Love Hospital Jello' by Chris Mansbridge

We were on the Annual Comor shoot and myself and Moss Patterson were eyeing up this cliff with a nice big flat landing. I like flat landings because its very rare you come cartwheeling out of them. Moss hit it first and made a good sized hole in the 80 cms of snot on the landing. I could barely hear him yelling, "Whatever you do, don't try to stomp it." I was like, "What? Try to stomp it? Okay."

I was being rushed to the hospital trying not to pass out just thinking, "Man the whole left side of my face hurts, and so does my knee. I wonder what happend?"

When I got to the hospital I saw Doglotion.com's main man Jamie Bond there with a broken humorus. Jamie was so excited,"Chris, you came to visit me. Man, you don't look so good."

After this X-ray and a CT scan in Vancouver, they told me that I had fractured my jaw, cheekbone, and pushed in my left sinus and orbital (eye socket). I would need to get my jaw wired shut and three titanium plates put in my face. I said I would be fine without them. They told me I was an idiot.

And the moral of the story is: You don't have to go to math class to find the value of X.

-Chris Mansbridge

'Not So Humerus' by Jamie Bond

April 9th, 2003 was a busy day in the Whistler Medical Clinic. It was the first powder (actually chowder) day in about 6 weeks at Whistler, and everyone had a little too much energy pent up inside. Early in the day before anything good opened, I was doing routine laps of the cliffs on Jersey Cream Wall on Blackcomb like I'd done since I knew what skis were. On my third lap I decided rather than going 'big to flat' I'd do a double drop on the far right wall, but rather than stomping it... something possessed me to be totally lame and kick back on landing... slamming my humerus bone against a covered rock. The freakiest part was when I started wiggling my fingers then turned around to look at my hand... and it wasn't there. It was about 1 foot away from wear I thought it was, because my nerve was damaged. Mmmmm, fun.

-Jamie Bond

'Slinky Pinky' by Kevin Gibbs Spring 2004.

Kevin didn't do this skiing, but to his credit, it was the first activity he did after the ski season... and thanks to a bad setting job... the last activity he did until this coming ski season. This one isn't as substantial as the other x-rays, but you have to admit -- it's pretty creapy eh? .

'Screw This' by Brice

Here we have a shin & fibula break with 12 inch pins and a nice screw... The problem with ice cascades is that underneath, you still find ice under a thin snow layer. Too thin probably! Happened in March 2002 in Arc 2000, French Alps.

-Brice

'My Leg Hurts... alot' by Sloppy Joe

Sloppy Joe may not be his real name, but this x-ray is his real game. What bone is that you might ask... the femur. Yep, that big bone in your leg, wouldn't that be fun to break? Needless to say, Sloppy's leg is now decorated with several titanium rods and screws, and he'd probably beep in metal detectors. But his leg is recovering really quickly, and he'll be skiing better than you again soon. .

How do you choose a winner with an exhibition like that?

1st Place: Sloppy Joe clearly ruled it, and his x-ray ruined our breakfast. Sloppy wins a Doglotion.com T-shirt of his choice and maybe we'll get him a Swedish Masseuse until he has recovered.

2nd Place: Brice walking around with 12 inch pins and screws is a disturbing thought. Brice wins a pair of Ryders sunglasses and world fame.

3rd Place: Chris Mansbridge's face x-ray rules, mostly because the skull looks so cool. Mansbridge doesn't get a prize, because if we reward him he might do it again. Well, maybe he'll get a t-shirt too.

Gaper Day 2004

J Dogg — Sun, 20 Jun 2004 00:00:00 -0400

Rating

On the last day of Whistler's season, June 6, 2004, the powers of the universe dragged all the most hard-core one-piece-suit wearing, rockgrinding, rear entry booters in the world together for a day of madness like none-other.

Starting the day with a mass rockgrind below the roundhouse, and more-or-less a chinese downhill to the green chair, the day was off to a good start. Then came the 'rapid-fire jump sequence', as onlookers were stunned to see everything from monoboards to snowlerblades, one-pieces to wetsuits, and business suits to torn jean shorts whipping past them off the table top in a magnificent display of daffys, twisters, spreads, frogs, and more.

Some big-name Whistler freeskiers were out to get in touch with the roots of modern day freeskiing, while heaps of other locals also showed up to progress rockgrinding and grass skiing to a new level... a level that should only be seen on Real TV. Heck, if all goes well you will see it on Real TV, keep your eye on it.

With the lowest snowpack in Gaper Day history, the gapers were forced to progress their gaper skills by abandoning snow all together. Why not eh? The slopes were pretty empty down to Olympic Station on the Whistler Gondola, probably because 2,000 feet uninterrupted grass skiing doesn't appeal to everyone. So after they had their share of hotdogging under the green chair, everyone who'd brought their rock skis headed for a few laps of grass 'n dirt, seeking as many grassy airs and creek gaps as they could find.

Meanwhile back in the alpine, the rest of the posse was busting their moves down the mogul runs on the glacier, and taking their monoboards and 219cm race skis to places they were never designed to go.

The hidden rocks and drainage ditches claimed their fair share of victims, much to the amusement of everyone on the chairlift.

The awesome display of gaper costumes and skills was too huge to keep track of this year, but when all was said and done, rumours started to stir about who took the highly coveted DoDo Bird Award. In the end the jury decided it went to Leif Zapf-Gilje, as nobody had topped his retardedly fast grass turns, grass-to-grass creek gaps, and gravel-skiing behind a truck in the parking lot.

Honourable mentions go out to...

Ryan McKeeman for shredding the whole day on a monoboard.

Shane for best 'Kevin Anderson' circa 1990 impression.

Chris Manbridge for everything he did in his gas mask that day.

Tobin for showing up no matter how many times he had to barf.

Sombrero Jamie for going down huge under the chair.

John Burr for incorperating his breifcase into all his tricks.

Lotte for strolling through the restaurant in snowlerblades.

And to everyone who came out. Thanks for keepin' it real, and if you thought this Gaper Day was keepin' it way too real... wait 'till next year. Our skis are in for a whole world of hurt.

Gaper Day 2003

J Dogg — Fri, 20 Jun 2003 00:00:00 -0400

Rating

On June 8th 1966, a tornado slammed into Topeka, Japan, injuring or killing over 500 people.

On June 8th 1867, architect Frank Loyd Wright was born.

But who cares, because June 8th, 2003 was... GAPER DAY!

For the last few years, a pack of Whistler skiers have been celebrating Gaper Day on the last day of the season, as a way of expressing their deep-down inner urge to ski in jeans, stretchies, or one-piece flourescent suites. Afterall, bush-skiing, ladder-sliding, rock-grinding, puddle-jumping and sillygoating require the most technical outerwear you can find. Nothing provides 'support' like tight jeans, nothing gets you into tighter places than snowblades, and nothing attracts the ladies like flourescent colours and stretch pants.

Gaper Day 2003 has come and gone, no lives were lost and no animals were harmed. Bush descents went down, rocks were grinded, and lets just say that the ski-out could've more (or any) snow. Check out the pics from the day.

The Gav Games 2002

J Dogg — Mon, 18 Nov 2002 00:00:00 -0500

Rating

The Gav Games, November 8-9, 2002. M S C, Edinburgh

by Crees Asquith

This year's British University Dry Slope competition, hold on, what a shit name!!! Everyone who's anyone and no one who's not, knew that this competition was only ever going to be called "The Gav Games". And so it was. This year the organisers wanted to pony up the competition, so it was decided that there would be an all crowd pleasing 'open' event, letting Billy McScumbag huck their huckables along side Rupert McStudentbaws, this time legitimately. Gav "Games" Carruthers told me at the post competition party "yyyyeess, iii huvvv bbbunn drriinking..... mmaa kneeee hurrtttssss". Yes, quite gav.

Not only were bones being broken in the Big Air competition, to ensure that the Ambulance services were being abused to the max, there was mini a slope (anti) style as well. With two rails and the usual kicker being used. Having the slopestyle in the morning was one way in ensuring that all the snowboarder-drunken-locals would turn up late. And thus they did.

With it being an open event the standard was, as expected, very high with most people being able to put their twin tips on the correct way for once. There was even the token monoboarder sliding rails! It doesn't get much better than that?!!? (Does anyone know if you can single eject out of those things?!?)

Mark Elliott, awake before 11am for the first time since 1986, concentrated on styling out the tricks he could do and turned out the eventual male ski slopestyle winner, somehow making his way through the course without wearing his beloved puffa jacket. UK Line skier and knitting fanatic, Andy Bennett up from Sheffield for the day, narrowly missed out on following up his White Out Weekend first place with a win, had to settle for second place after styling out a rodeo 5 over the kicker and cleaning the rails. Later on he could be heard wandering around the post competition party demanding "Lets go down pub for hotpot la'ad?". As mad as a bottle of chips. Third place was taken by 10 year old Murray "Mitch" Buchan, his decision that the idea of gapping the 10ft long and 4ft high final rail in the slopestyle course would be better than actually sliding the thing proved favourable with the judges.

During the prolonged sabbatical, the jump was re-opened for a jam session and last chance practice session before the big air qualifiers. Sketch Syndicate, vocal host for the day, pretend snowboarder & the funniest man to use a microphone since Michael Barrymore's was lost in a swimming pool, continually amped the crowd up with his continual mocking of the racers racing their racism on the adjacent slope. Buy Syndicate clothing.

Onto the Big Air. The money event. Literally. For the last and certainly not least pony up-er, $500 (www.currencyconvertor.com) cash was put up for grabs, winner takes all. No 1st, 2nd and 3rd nonsense. You throwdown, they throwdown. Come on, this is as much as Josh Loubec uses in hair products every week and we all know that's alot. This is the one the crowd were waiting for. No gates to chase, they wanted to see the tricks, they wanted the style, they wanted the hucking but more than the nipples of the baby Jesus they wanted to see some pain and i'll be darned if the drunken blighters weren't going to get it! As usual at a jibbing competition, people were hucking their meat left right and centre, trying tricks they've never done before. Carnage. The crowd loved it. The amount of money that could have been made from yard sales was unbelievable!!

Four non-university skiers & boarders qualified for the finals along with four university skiers and boarders - or at least I think that was the case, the reason why it was a university competition, was because you need a degree in macro-bi-polar-knetic-maths to understand what the heck was going on!

After all was said and done snowboarders Neil Cruickshank & Beanie and Line skiers Paddy Graham, a huge Celine Dion fan & Andy Bennett, were left to show the crowd a thing or two about a thing or two in the Super (dooper) Final. One jump for five hundred smackers then. There's nothing like a bit of pressure to make someone to do something stupid. With Beanie bustin a phat 900 in the Finals, Sketchasurus took it apon himself to convince the crowd to convince Beanie to step it up. "GO BIG OR GO HOME!! TTeeeennn EEEiighhttyy, Tteeenn Eeeeiighhhtyyyyyy" was the chant. Beanie is not one that seems to have a problem with doing something crazy from time to time, didn't disappoint, with a rapidly thrown 1080, landing a little back seat, but crazy none the less. Neil Cruickshank (i think) was next, styling out a huge backside 180. Not a super tech trick, but the style points were high.

By now the crowd were loving the hucking action and it was only going to get better from here on in. Two jumps left. 14 year old Paddy Graham was first up, his second hand Mike Nick helmet was obviously not holding him back in the way it had it's former Lui Kang loving owner, as he put the pressure on by stomping an insane D-Spin 7 safety grab. Last jump of the night, everyone else has thrown down. One jump for $500. He'd been stomping the switch rodeo's all night but on the most crucial one of all his landing was little off, landing a touch back seat.

The winner of the moula in the end was Paddy Graham. With this big bucks win, he has now earned more money in one night than most of Sheffield's inhabitants do in a year. Beanie, for his 1080 madness, won a bottle of After Shock, to him that is worth way more than $500.

-Crees Asquith